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The Continental Herald & Foreign Review

Annum 1924 · Number 4 — North America

A War Without End: California (Erendil) and Mexico (Perlidze) Lock Horns

The mutual antipathy of California (Erendil) and Mexico (Perlidze) has continued for 4 full years of active warfare, marked by ceaseless trench-work and cannonades. Military historians struggle to remember the original pretext that provoked this devastating clash of empires. 'We record the movements of regiments today, but only history will reveal the true bill,' mused a newspaper editor. Publishers of continental almanacs suspended printing until revised frontiers could be authenticated.

Dispatches from the Front

Primacy of Arms: Quebec (shero) Stands Foremost with 12 Centers

At the close of another arduous campaign year, Quebec (shero) stands foremost among all contending nations with 12 supply centers under its command. While 18 centers still divide the court from the 30 centers required for victory, its preeminence is undeniable. Outside the grand palace of Quebec, cheering throngs demanded appearances from the sovereign and military commanders. 'Such bold manoeuvres redraw the balance of power across the continent,' remarked a retired admiral.

Dispatches from the Front

Stern Reversal: Florida (Tim4egg) Ousts New York (Hennahen²⁷⁶³) from Sector at Chesapeake Bay

The contested field of Chesapeake Bay witnessed the retreat of New York (Hennahen²⁷⁶³), whose vanguard could not withstand the relentless pressure exerted by Florida (Tim4egg). Field ambulances and baggage trains choked the outbound highways. Trading on the bourses of New York was suspended as government securities plummeted precipitously. The legal justifications issued by the crown lawyers are as intricate as they are thoroughly unconvincing.

Dispatches from the Front

Ascendant Preponderance: Quebec (shero) Absorbs 4 Additional Strongholds

Fortune has smiled upon the arms of Quebec (shero) beyond all expectation, resulting in the acquisition of 4 centers in a single campaigning season. Triumphal parades were decreed to honor the generals who directed the offensive. A surge of national pride swept the industrial towns of Quebec, where factory whistles blew in celebration. Whether the newly acquired subjects will welcome their benefactors with bouquets or barricades remains an open question.

Dispatches from the Front

Imperial Contraction: Net Loss of 2 Centers for British Columbia (GraffTroll)

Dispatches brought by the morning mail packet reveal that the military perimeter of British Columbia (GraffTroll) has buckled under sustained enemy attacks, resulting in the forfeiture of 2 centers. State censors have attempted to suppress news of the retreats, but panic spreads through the capital. Foreign loans were abruptly denied to British Columbia as continental financiers took fright. Military experts agree that the operation was conducted with absolute perfection, apart from its unanticipated outcome.

Dispatches from the Front

Position Preserved: Peru (Keeper) Denies Cali to Advancing Columns of Cuba (Эльф ушастый)

The redoubts of Cali held fast under a punishing bombardment as Peru (Keeper) successfully defied the reinforced divisions of Cuba (Эльф ушастый). Resolute counter-attacks at the forward trenches threw the assaulting echelons into confusion. Banquets and gala performances were hastily arranged in every theatre district throughout Peru. Tavern keepers near the border have installed revolving flagpoles to accommodate the rapid succession of military administrations.

Chancery Reports & Envoys

Unforgiving Hatred: The Long Clash of British Columbia (GraffTroll) and Quebec (shero)

According to telegraph dispatches received at dawn, the confrontation between British Columbia (GraffTroll) and Quebec (shero) remains as uncompromising as ever, marked by unending frontier vigilance and border artillery duels. Telegraph stations report that active skirmishing also spread to Calgary and Vancouver. Neutral observers report that trade across the disputed sectors has been wholly abandoned. Local innkeepers report that retreating and advancing soldiers alike possessed an identical appetite for unpaid poultry. Newspaper vendors in neutral capitals shouted the latest broadsheet extras to packed tramcars.

Chancery Reports & Envoys

Generations of Spite: California (Erendil) and Texas (Space Monk) Renew Their Duel

Couriers arriving from the forward garrisons confirm that the feud between California (Erendil) and Texas (Space Monk) has now entered its 3 years of uninterrupted strife. Veteran officers remark that the boundary lines have become vast graveyards of spent ordnance and broken ambitions. Neutral legations dispatched urgent ciphers to their home courts appraising the shifting equilibrium. The sovereign's speech was received with thunderous applause by an audience consisting entirely of paid palace attendants.

The Continental Bourse

The bourse turns decidedly bleak for British Columbia (GraffTroll), which forfeits 2 centers to settle at 3 supply centers. Panic selling surrounds the credit of Chicago (Welat), which drops 1 center to hold just 3 centers. Tax receipts and rail receipts tell the same tale in Quebec (shero): up 4 centers to stand at 12 supply centers. Chancery auditors in Texas (Space Monk) strike 1 center from their register, leaving the state with 4 centers.

Diplomatic Insinuations

Society hostesses whisper of an impending dynastic marriage between an impoverished cousin of Chicago and the heir to Texas. Gossip along the bourse indicates that financiers of Peru have quietly underwritten the municipal debt of the chief port of Mexico.

The Public Ledger & Broadside Miscellany

Thick fog blankets the harbors; merchant sloops sound mournful horns through the gray damp.

The Public Ledger & Broadside Miscellany

PATENT TRENCH-BOOTS: Vulcanized rubber soles, impervious to damp, mud, and protracted sieges. Wholesale discounts for regiment quartermasters.

PowerCentres±
Quebec (shero)12+4
Cuba (Эльф ушастый)70
Mexico (Perlidze)60
Florida (Tim4egg)60
New York (Hennahen²⁷⁶³)50
California (Erendil)50
Texas (Space Monk)4-1
Peru (Keeper)30
Chicago (Welat)3-1
British Columbia (GraffTroll)3-2