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The Universal Post & State Register

Year 1927 · Issue 7 — Canton

The Open Wound: Hostilities Persist Between British Empire (2-20) and Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин)

Dispatches telegraphed via the naval cable affirm that the enmity dividing British Empire (2-20) and Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин) remains unyielding, with both sovereigns committed to pursuing the contest to its bitter conclusion. Chancery archives show the mutual enmity has persisted unabated for 5 years. General staff planners on each side are already stockpiling munitions for the next round of hostilities. The official communiqués are masterpieces of prose, omitting only the minor details of what actually took place. In financial clubs across the continent, private bets were quietly laid on the endurance of the new lines.

Field Reports & War Bulletins

Imperial Destiny: France (Эльф ушастый) Approaches Supreme Victory

Only 2 centers separate France (Эльф ушастый) from absolute victory, having amassed 17 of the 19 strongholds of the continent. Sovereign after sovereign sends frantic couriers seeking allies, but time is running out. Railway stations across France resounded with patriotic anthems as mobilization timetables were hailed as flawless. The telegraph cables carried so many high-minded patriotic appeals that the wires were suspected of overheating from sheer rhetoric.

Field Reports & War Bulletins

Fortunes Rise for France (Эльф ушастый): A Bold Leap Forward

Fortune has smiled upon the arms of France (Эльф ушастый) beyond all expectation, resulting in the acquisition of 4 centers in a single campaigning season. Triumphal parades were decreed to honor the generals who directed the offensive. Bells tolled from every cathedral spire across France as celebratory proclamations were read aloud. Bunting merchants report record profits, having prudently stocked flags of all participating nations in equal measure.

Field Reports & War Bulletins

Frontiers Recede: Japan (@interdant) Surrenders 4 Strongholds

Reliable accounts relayed by neutral steamship captains affirm that the military perimeter of Japan (@interdant) has buckled under sustained enemy attacks, resulting in the forfeiture of 4 centers. State censors have attempted to suppress news of the retreats, but panic spreads through the capital. The government of Japan faced fierce interrogations in parliament over the catastrophic miscalculation. Philosophers note that the war has decisively proven whatever each side intended to prove before firing a single shot.

Field Reports & War Bulletins

Foundries and Arsenals: France (Эльф ушастый) Expands Its Standing Force

Flushed with imperial revenue, France (Эльф ушастый) has placed 3 new fighting divisions into active service. This formidable reinforcement sends a clear signal of determination to neighboring courts. A surge of national pride swept the industrial towns of France, where factory whistles blew in celebration. It is widely agreed that the only true victors of the campaign were the manufacturers of gun-grease and hardtack.

Field Reports & War Bulletins

War Footing: Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин) Recruits Fresh Formations

According to telegraph dispatches received at dawn, the cabinet of Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин) has expanded its armed forces by commissioning 1 additional formation on land and sea. Shipyards and drill grounds have been operating day and night to equip the levies. 'The boldness of the maneuver will be debated in staff colleges for decades,' declared a senior war correspondent. Foreign observers remark that treaties in this part of the world seem designed principally to be broken in scenic locations.

Diplomatic Intelligence

Unbroken Feud: British Empire (2-20) and France (Эльф ушастый) in Relentless Struggle

The mutual antipathy of British Empire (2-20) and France (Эльф ушастый) has continued for 3 full years of active warfare, marked by ceaseless trench-work and cannonades. Military historians struggle to remember the original pretext that provoked this devastating clash of empires. 'The sovereign exchange cares nothing for territorial ambition, only for solvency and stability,' stated a merchant banker. Government couriers on express locomotives crossed international frontiers throughout the stormy night.

Diplomatic Intelligence

War of Exhaustion: British Empire (2-20) and Japan (@interdant) Refuse All Compromise

Neither side has displayed the slightest inclination toward an armistice, as British Empire (2-20) and Japan (@interdant) persist in their unremitting struggle along the frontier. The two rival powers have now been locked in open hostility for 2 years. Scribes in the chanceries have long ceased drafting protocols for a pacification that nobody expects. Newspaper vendors in neutral capitals shouted the latest broadsheet extras to packed tramcars. Diplomatic correspondents observe that both sovereigns have simultaneously declared victory, leaving the geography to sort itself out.

The Continental Bourse

The ledger of British Empire (2-20) is written in red ink this season (-1), leaving the realm with 4 centers. A painful contraction for Japan (@interdant), shedding 4 centers in revenue to retain only 4 centers. Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин) reports buoyant revenue, climbing by 1 center to settle at 9 centers. Tax receipts and rail receipts tell the same tale in France (Эльф ушастый): up 4 centers to stand at 17 supply centers.

Rumours from the Salons

A retired attaché insists that negotiators from China and Ottoman Empire spent three days shooting grouse together in neutral territory before the campaign. Gossip along the bourse indicates that financiers of Japan have quietly underwritten the municipal debt of the chief port of Ottoman Empire.

The Public Ledger & Broadside Miscellany

Crisp autumn gales sweep through the river valleys, scattering fallen leaves and diplomatic drafts alike.

The Public Ledger & Broadside Miscellany

FOR SALE: Sound mahogany campaign desk, slightly scorched by shell-splinters. Suitable for a junior minister or ambitious field marshal.

PowerCentres±
France (Эльф ушастый)17+4
Ottoman Empire (Рулин Крутин)9+1
British Empire (2-20)4-1
Japan (@interdant)4-4
Russia (Edinthebossnian)10
China (GraffTroll)10